Tag Archives: survival

Light A Candle

Image

They want my mete
Fried liver and cake
I got none so they take
clothes from my back and eat
Tis the one they make
I’m beat
My egg
Hard boiled refuses to crackkk
Sharks want my blood
My stake is under attack
I’m in the black
Cooked by the market
Well in the read
Just not rare enough for black
They see me so they saw me
Can’t slice me so they knife me
With legalities
The poor me pours me
Rich in spirit
Rum applauds me
Brandy brands me intoxicating
Yet they set the flame again
Stand still watching me burn
My brain turns
My two hands open to heaven
Shadrach Meshach and Abednego
My eye, the third
Looks for the fourth man
I am
Staring Nebuchadnezzar in the eye
Waiting for mine to dry because I
Am not at home in the fire
Acid tears spit from my soul
My cheeks corrode in desperation
My skeleton eats itself for inspiration
Love will find away
Blessings wiith my name
This is just a test
Wait and be patient
Are like cassettes to an Mp3 player
Sooth sayers could use sayings
To sooth the decaying
So often I feel too used to praying
Like God wants me to tell him
But I feel vain
Telling him the same again and again
Logic would call me insane
If faith was a straight jacket lock me away
Bills after bills and no money to pay
I write not sing so I don’t blow the roof away
I stay schemin and breathin
Running on steam
I’m boiling my dreams so I can drink the reality
Of Mortal combat
One hit fatality
Resurrect and gain clarity
All I want is parity
Charity I’m giving well
Hoping Karma does the same
Don’t feel me blow me
I just don’t want to sound vane
Feels like I moved mountains with my faith
To see quicksand again
Light and candle for my dark
My heart’s like ripped page to a flame
I pour vinegar in deep wounds so you can taste of my pain
Suffering violence in silence
Don’t mean my mode changed
I’ve just caught something dark without throwing shade

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Filed under Just Living

Departure Lounge

Dear

oh it doesn’t matter

Mad as a hatter because I allowed your small plate to sit next to my platter

Grace my table with irreverent chatter while I feed your mind I find myself starved of decent conversation

We twist and turn like ice creams covering ourselves in that sweet sauce of lust

A desire for a good thing causes us to trust in the idea of trust without studying the mental photo of us

We dust off our baggage and brace ourselves for a rollercoaster

We’d rather be a Warhol poster than a negative in the darkroom

Sweeping the truth with the hardbroom of ignorance to the facts

We connect better disconnected so lets not beat ourselves into this and hope friendship covers tracks

We both want new roots to replace those hacked

Been rolled up like a door mat and smoked like a cheap spliff

It’s not enough to be seen as a drug yet our abusers aren’t good enough to sniff

I find I snort the game, yet you and I are each others supply of novocaine

We need to take control again, get out the window seat and declare I’ll be fly

Develop a new operating system a new U, I

We gotta precede to proceed

Sometimes you’ve gotta be grieved to be relieved

It’s like the release of held pee after you’ve heard that flush

The grass is only greener when you’ve grown it and treated it

Only then can it be lush, plush and give you that rush

Make you feel like its slowed down to your time

Our time

That’s if after all these checks in the airport of the mind your baggage is labelled alongside mine

See I just need time to check in with my mirror before I let anyone be an extension of my reflection

I crave attention, love affection, love to be loved but times I need detention

Learn the lesson of my retention before your name is the first humane I mention cos

Even though your nearer than I think

I don’t want to miss you if I blink, dismiss you if I get a hint that something simply ain’t right

Matter of fact we’re shaking hands until I know you’ll be around to watch this ink dry

Regardless

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Filed under Relationships

B.A.Nning Order

Still by my skin tone I should have a sports team or a ring tone

Yet for years I was skin and bone because I walked to work unable to afford the bus home

But I am not your broke ass negro

When it comes to relations I’ve been alone

Disowned by my own

Made to feel a sell out because I didn’t buy into narrow minded sing-a-longs

I like chocolate vanilla and cinnamon

But I am not your broke ass negro

The walls are speaking I feel them breathing

My life leaves some grieving about underachievement

I’ve had to patch and weave things to survive and feed me

They snipe and lead me like a big cat to the Zambezi

Try to drown me in comparison, liken me to Audley Harrison

But I am not, your broke ass negro

I am not your broke ass negro I am that brother fighting to live

Not your gym class hero, just a lover dying to give

My equities zero but I’m nouveau riche

Just capitalist minds won’t measure me on the populist list

Yet I seek to better me

Some just want a better me, while others try to feather me

Tickle my ego, stick in the needle be infused with my substance as here we go

Get off on my supply and leave me to die,

A reluctant broke ass negro

If I was broke I’d be dead but my heart is still beating

I’ve taken some beating but this egg will be an omelette when it’s done heating

See along the way I’ve had to go to some wild places and gain some flavours

I’ve had to up my skill level, change some behaviours

I’m aware of my flaws I want to be loved for my plus points

Instead of being derided for being an urban myth, a great man that never wasr

Don’t take this as unsubstantiated moans cause

I’ve learned to be patient but I wont tolerate the

Lack of respect for the struggles I face the, position in my race

In my lane I keep the pace

I’m not working at your favourite pizza place

I’m not sitting on my backside with 4 kids by 3 women playing Xbox

I’m not hustling my number none hit at the train station with the immortal question

Yo blood, do you like hip hop

I respect the hustle and I don’t feel a hero

But I’ve got 2 degrees with the strength to keep knocking on the door of a career so don’t you dare label me a broke ass negro

Don’t say it with your eyes, with your heart, with any of your body language

I want to be able to do more than treat myself to a subway sandwich

See I’ve planned my years around career progression

Avoided holidays like science homework then we’ve hit recession

Hit the rocks of stress but never sunk into depression

So to the guys with relatives who say when folk ask what you do – don’t tell them

To the guys that work hard and don’t get the recognition they deserve I hope you have or find someone that makes you happy and helps you be your best

To the guys that regardless of how hard life hits them they get up strengthened

Hear my expression and adopt or lengthen

I am not your broken negro

You need to mend your ego, give it an abortion

I refuse to be a broken man, I strive for bigger portions

For I AM ME

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Filed under Race