Tag Archives: religion

Between Jobs

I am stuck. Between the comforts of what I started with and perspectives I have now. I am stuck.

Like Bruce Banner in the latest of The Avengers series of movies (e.g. End Game) and the Hulk. I, am, stuck. Between a doctrine and expression of church I like and beliefs around how church should be.

I am stuck, between my heart and my head, my soul and my eyes – watching the stock in faith leaders’ demise rise.

It has been close to a year since I was last committed to a church. A place that I consider to have enabled a degree of peace and stability in my life. No matter how bad things have gotten, I have always had my faith. I could always channel my energies in that direction in the hope that everything else turns around.

So what happens when the very thing that brings you stability becomes the source of anger, pain and distrust? Do you say “that’s it I’m never going back to another”, do you rebound into the arms of whoever will welcome you? Most people do and just continue in their bubble with a new set of connections that keep things ticking over.

For me, being without a church has felt like being without a job. Although being free to do my own thing is good for a week or 3 and the application process (see church search) is tiresome, you start to notice the isolation. Maybe, like my working life, I’ve rarely been without it.  In that time, I’ve seen motivation to engage with that world fall flatter with occasional peaks.

I wonder, if like my period of unemployment, I’ll find something of a dream environment to thrive in again. I wonder if that will be a lasting thing or have the plug pulled in loss of funding type fashion. I wonder if this is a dying of the light inside or a chapter of recovery from the pain caused by more than one period of hurt inflicted by that environment.

Many more high profile than I have publicly denounced their now former beliefs after much questioning. Although I am not minded to denounce mine, I find this period at the cross roads a lengthy and at times, uncomfortable one. As the search continues my observations may yield questions that may or may not get answers. In the long run, not knowing may be fine if the impetus to move takes over. What fuels that? Only God Knows.

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Filed under Faith

Lament of a Psalmist

lament

You can feel intimate with a militant. 

They seem so real, yet when you touch them, you feel silicone. 

But God said! So their thus said is legitimate. 

Ignorant innocents are impudent kites

Hold on or be hung by string theory

Holy rollers become weed smokers.

Unnoticed, Moses became the Joker

Deleting pixels for their picture a bat symbol, not magnum opus

Hopeful loyalists practice upper lip stiffness as wisdom

Won’t take a knee or comb the heir to the family business.

Live in a dragons den whispering their knowledge of the litmus.

This divine monopoly’s a comedy of vapours and groupthink.

Where the audience is clowned for pointing out it stinks.

Rub sticks and create fire or feel the sword like molar of holy rollers

Code masters unmask the mode of most high and create players to sacrifice.

Who am I?

A born sinner, a dinner, a lost soul to a soul winner that won’t vary the bait.

Space invaders, snipers, rangers marshal the momentum of the naysayer.

Demon days filled with gorillas, gargoyles and goblins are a Lord’s Prayer.

Whose frames do you wear? Do you die or dare? Be a black life, matter?

I see red tape masters speak tongues in monotones like heaven’s got their name on the deed.

With all of these gang signs and storms seen I’m falling through my flaws.

My moorings are unsure and I’m dying to breathe, searching for answers.

If the real God we can’t see, is it because of us or gospel gangsters?

 

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Filed under Random Poetics

Dusted

leaving home

I was a Lego brick on heaven’s tables with ambitions of being Babel

It would be gravy if I trained well.

I wore the King James label like Air Jordans as an enabler to tap the mike

Cutting shapes for the sake of grand designs lit the eyes.

This mind was primed to freehand more than stencil.

The palette was filled with many colours yet I could only use one

Chew the word and bite your tongue, a babbling baby is free speech.

Slap you with psalms 1 -1 take the p when they reach

They besmirch and beseech the only souls that matter are those of their feet.

Watch how you breathe for Bruce Banner can’t stand spanners in the manor.

What’s love for the poets if you put slammers in the slammer.

Play hangman with every hang up, kill a so-called joker if they stand up

Raise your voice or raise the standard, one day I put my hands up

See I’d chewed on the green grass of home like it was magnanimous manna

How can you be two-faced if you don’t know you’ve got a mask on?

Why fight when I was rapt in the moment that my modem connected.

I didn’t know the download had been infected.

Exceptions and rules wisdom and fools the best fell afoul of while many played chicken.

To challenge was to play hopscotch in a minefield.

Jet fuel from a pulpit could melt your steel if you didn’t have the minerals

They built you so they can kill you.

They built you so they can kill, you.

I’d heed them and repent for I’m a heathen, seedling of evil if I believed them.

I counted years as days, days as hours, hours as minutes and in 15 I’d lost 30

In his eyes were fire and from his mouth swords but this revelation was not written by John.

The shoes I walked in were gone. Was heaven under new management?

Thought I was strapped in! Madness!

Stunned, I snapped into a coma, knowing I could explode at any moment.

Burnt by the cold and homeless, I should have known this was coming.

As the truth created fractions, my history was flagged to be deleted.

I learned that secrets were common knowledge and life hacking wasn’t to make things easier

So I vowed I wouldn’t give them flowers when they’ve kicked the bucket just to keep up appearances.

I’m no longer dumbfounded by the conceited for the mask has fallen.

They put karma’s face on the coin so I dare them to call it.

 

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Filed under Random Poetics

Man vs Food Prayer

man v food

Our father who art in gluttony
Adam Richman be thy name
Thy will be done
Food challenges won
In homes and kitchens as they are on Food Network
Give us these tastes, our cravings met
And forgive us our appetite
As we cheer on those who eat with us
Lead us into temptation but deliver us from heaving
For yours is the steak, barbecue and the chilli
Food may win
It’s a blessing you’ve given
From now until the next time
Amen

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Filed under Random Poetics

The Watcher

We live to garner misty eyed history
What’s the jewel in a vision when a fool can twitter wisdom?
Rumours fuel the cistern, news drives the piston
Gears of war we shift them
Buy into the download without questioning trade position

Occupy, religion, a petition for peace
A theism will be the currency of the beast
You’re a zone soon timeless imprisoned by reservoir dogs
Chanting for the real man as though man can really be God

Trying to educate Rita’s I wonder why we bother
It’s like impregnating women that don’t want you as the father
Time to face the ugly truth, talk about pre-Madonna’s
Charisma carpenter’s superficial
Seems we’re finishing in the darkness
Fighting the fiction of forefathers
Enshrined in Jean Paul Sartre
Claiming to be Levite rooted amidst a climate of dishonour

Fiscal factions, code masters, program us to disarmour
The liberty once fought for
When’s the roll going up yonder?
Has earth ever been this sombre?

The romance of advances an antidote to privacy
Increase taxes in broad daylight
Yet want to jail us for prayer and piracy
Minority reports, majority too blind to see
Animosity retorts truth is a crime, believe
Elohim mixed spit with dirt
My template for life in rhyme to bleed.

So Sick it’s almost tasteful
Tell your ears grab a plateful
So much Scheisse’s served in factual fable
I wonder are we Cain or Able?
The governments lost its bite
The army seems so sabre
Bobby Caldwell brought the light
Now we’re spotting signs of illumination

Earthquakes, typhoons volcanoes
An ex Fugee helps the Haitians
Black panthers are chocolate Nazis
Who never get de nominations
Napalm’s the new facial
Post a picture to your Facebook
You’ll see a Christian observing Ramadan
Before a Sharia leader tastes pork
Cos gaining status is a cakewalk

Is that incite or hate talk?
Fork in the revelation?
When some folks job is to ignore
I wake them with this my resignation
I’m just an apprentice baker
Serving a piece of peace to the creation
What is the truth of freedom?
When speaking your mind is inflammation
See they tie us to the net
Drip feed us degradation
Wiki leaks are demonised
Yet divorce is information
Consumerism is a religion
Where every guru gains a saint hood
Some worship fame and money
Then claim to the world there aint a God
Am I a bible basher because I dare to name God?

Mass conversions on the rise, trending topic, it aiint hard
There’s no tape for me to duct down so join my fight on the same card
In time a poet will be known as saying instead of their name
The bar(re)d

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Filed under Society

Last Words

Like the refrain of a keeper who got taken for a night stand

The last words of a fool brought the birth of a wise man

Shoulda would coulda became I am I can

I stand,

Up like a hyped fan, hardcore on the terraces

I man

Up on the premises, with knowledge of my nemesis

I ran, up in the heresies of Sadducees and philistines

Casting stone chips from the Exodus tablets to which they’ve been blind

Like medicine for ignorance water for chocolate

Too many yell F the world but I just sleep on top of it

Don’t care if my type will fit I’ve too many keys to be bored

Journalists use their qwerty to hurt me and liberals wont see my sword

Jabbing with rapier thrusts, raping and lusts, every phones a private eye

Which private I will eye trust

Political worlds are warring as our capital goes bust

It’s an economical vasectomy yet we’re all getting cuts

My country was on the cusp before she became a hoe for affection

See we’re already marked by the beast there’ll be no peace till the injection

I’m sniffing jailhouse rock to give my spirit an erection

Ignorance was bliss till I was damascussed by perfection

Now I kill myself to see the light like life was a rigged election

I see immaculate conceptions, conceptual connections masked by safe complexions

The end game is on reference Jay-Z and Obama deceptions

I’ll reach for a holy condom and call it supernatural protection

Only poets read poetry, communists destroyed the capital affection

Now Lupe Fiasco’s Dumb it down is our guitar’s plectrum

So Like the refrain of a keeper who got taken for a night stand

The last words of a fool brought the birth of a wise man

And Shoulda would coulda became I can for I am

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Filed under Just Living