Tag Archives: depressed

My Adidas

 

Sometimes your stride pattern is just as important as your shoes. The worn soul of mine meant all I had was my stride. All I had were stops and starts, long presses and short taps, perhaps they were Morse code to the universe, calling out for a new pair.

From the miles I have walked, the only thing I would wish upon anyone is the beauty of acquaintances providing rest from the intense heat.

Having made many strides, in recent times I found a formidable adversary that challenged me to dance down treacle-filled streets with concrete blocks strapped to my feet.

Even with two shoes as two sides to a story, my truth in all of this was that I had to Get Out. Clearings that energised me to walk a certain way were blocked or simply no longer existed.

I’d been here about 14 years ago yet I’d forgotten what the storm felt like. I forgot the scar caused by the lightning, I forgot the days of darkness and how I would have to keep my eyes open, fighting with the same fingertips I was holding onto my sanity with.

Every now and then my eyes would mistake a candle for the sun, yeah… I’d been here before. How many more strides could I get through?

Ask a friend, ask an adversary?

She sipped tea like Miss Piggy proved Kermit was cheating.

Stirred it now and then to keep me in a hopeless place.

My records laid before her showed my performance was ace

12-and-a-half years a slave, I took my calls and beatings.

When Liberty shook her bell I ran away, to freedom

The universe stopped re-healing my shoes and sent me several new pairs. The equilibrium has changed, I drive instead of walk, I have new scenery to take in and understand.

Even though lightning left a deeper scar from the second strike, I know that the path I am on is one that is made for me.

New shoes, my strides, in the words of Nas….”Whose world is this?”

Leave a comment

Filed under Non Poetic Blogs

Unwanted

Sometimes….I feel 

Like a rudderless child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudder less child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a fatherless child
A lone stranger
An embryo

Liquid flames cased in power puff names
Pains engaged to a hair trigger guage
Distorted inceptions and schools of disdain
Encumber my soul with melodic chill blains
I’m lost in ill gains, strapped to real frames
My electric lion flow has been tamed
Trying not to settle, my earth has been maimed
Dying to be a tribute act though I lit my own fame
Scarred with in sense, I stink out the game
My knowledge they deem is too out there for in-game
My mettle’s twisted so I touch my in sane
My pane is transparent and I’m the heir apparent
I’m all gassed up as his history I parrot
I’d snap the neck of every clock for every time I wanna garrot
A strap line that entwines my heart to this brand cos

Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudderless child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudder less child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a fatherless child
A lone stranger
An embryo

A rodent on the wheel of fortune, running
Sporting a back pack of rations gunning
chasing the mirror till it falls off bloodied
To applause and jeers of is that all he studied
chased the pack catching all the nuts n ruts
he swivelled the inflection yet the echo stayed put
he, broke his back to heal men when hell was afoot
yet sparing no change he felt only rifle butts
Bayonets to the gut, enoch’s rivers were his blood
speech, so flowing were his veins
You were nothing but hanging mucus when needed
nothing but a bane so

Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudderless child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudder less child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a fatherless child
A lone stranger
An embryo

Ineffectual vibrations preach wisdom to holed walls
Disrespect migrates, generational roll calls
Keep picking up the phone hoping my garden grows balls
Bog hands noting the viscosity of snow fall
Naked can I handle when the stalactites fall
I’ve got a mouth of stalagmites but no choir on which to call
They’ve got no room for my range I’m just a car left to stall
My bairns bereft of heart set to crawl
Supposed grab life that ain’t even a trip for me to fall
So I scribe symbols in the dirt, scriptures for you all
cos

Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudderless child
Sometimes….I feel
Like a rudder less child

Sometimes….I feel
Like a fatherless child
A lone stranger

A vogue stranger
A known angel
Unwanted

Leave a comment

Filed under Just Living